2013, the year I call myself a professional because at this point, I am by @LakeshoreJohnny

The conversation went like this over Christmas. 

Wife: So how’s your boyfriend doing?

Wife’s Cousin: Good. He’s still working in New York editing. Well, not really. He’s the editors assistant. Meaning he turns the computers on, gets the software ready, you know.

Me: Oh, that’s still cool though.

Wife’s Cousin: Yeah, he really wants to be a director though, but you know, that’s a hard gig to get.

#MFW #MFW #MFW (http://imdb.to/WSAfmu) http://

Cut to a few days later…

Me: See, she said even her boyfriend wanted to be a Director.

Wife: Yeah

Me: That’s cool though that he’s editing and stuff, but you know, not everyone can be a director like me *said in ego boost xp tone of voice*

Wife: Yeah, but he’s getting paid to do it so, you can’t really knock him.

*Ego xp comes crashing down to 0*

And thus, we have reason #3240 my wife would be a great producer. I’m the dreamer, she’s the realist. I always go to her for ideas and use her as a bouncing board. Was I right? Yes. Was she right? Painfully, yes. But that’s what makes us a good team. Balance. Two perspectives. 

Of course, if I were in a film meeting with someone I’m not married to and they said that to my face like she did, I would’ve thrown my chair at them and thrown a haymaker to their soul.

But alas, I move on.

My wife kind of knocked something loose in my brain when she said what she said. Her cousin’s boyfriend is getting paid to set up AVID somewhere in New York for the real editors. Me? I’m still in the exact same job I had when I was 21. Granted, it’s a good job, but its not a job that involves me saying “action” or “cut” or “lets try that one again, this time with more feeling towards each other”.

Then I started digging more.

He’s getting paid to be in the field that he loves, but not in what he wants to do. Thus, one could maybe argue that his checks are for something that he doesn’t want to do full-time.

I’m too am getting paid full-time in something I hate, but I have the credentials that people want more than anything.

How different are me and that dude? We’re not. We’re almost in the same boat, but not really. Coke/Pepsi.

Personally, I’d give him the slight edge over myself just because he’s getting paid to work in the field of his dreams (No Kevin Costner). Me? I’m so far from the filmmaking field, its like going to law school and telling Mom and Dad you want to become a Doctor. My job has about 0.3% in common with films. The only advantage to my job is that I have time at work to write blog posts and or screenplays during my 8-5 and holy hell did I just type that outloud and post it to the general public no I did not delete delete delete.

Him getting paid in comparison to me not getting paid yet having credentials than him pretty much bottoms out to about even. The 2011 version of me would’ve said “FUCK HIM. I’M BETTER BECAUSE THIS INDIE INDUSTRY IS CUTTHROAT”. The 2012 version of me would’ve said “Well, hold on. Lets all brand together and create a collective renaissance rather than compete against each other”. 2013 me says “Lets go”.

I’ve now started thinking of the indie film community as a train. Not the xhamster.com ones you see online, but as a literal train. There’s the lead engine, followed by the railroad cars. Each railroad car being whatever an indie filmmaker brings to the table. Whether it be an editor, someone that makes really good EPK’s, someone who knows actors who will work for gas money and high fives or whatever, each part of the train is as important as the person saying “cut” or “sandwiches are ready”.

As you’ve probably expected though, I did do a quick IMDB search for my wife’s cousin’s boyfriend (WCBF for short) and I couldn’t find him. He has one of those med-school cadaver names though (John Smith, Lisa Williams, Frank Johnson), so it was really hard to find him in the 35+ findings. That only gave me a brief moment of validation that I have such a complicated and unique last name. IMDB-search for me, you’ll find me. There are no other filmmakers with my name.

Short story long, I suppose getting paid to do what you love is the way to go about life. But sometimes Ferris' life motto he gave us is right. I did that but ended up in a job that I hate. But somehow, my bills are paid and my wife and I are able to eat pizza and wings every Friday without worrying about making rent. My WCBF may feel the same about himself right now. Maybe not, maybe so. Us indie people know when something feels right though. If its not what we envisioned, nothing will replace it. I’m sure he and I could vent, rant and rave for hours about how much it sucks not doing what we want to do. Who knows. Maybe our moons will align and he’ll connect with me or vice versa. We’ll see.

He can always find ways to contact me on IMDB.